Disciplinarian

The Disciplinarian Blog was created as a spanking journal. It is about adjusting the attitudes and behaviors of my Significant Other through firm consequences. If this topic offends you in any way, do not read any further. All Domestic Discipline occurs with a written contract between my SO and myself.

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Location: United States

Tuesday, February 28, 2006

Positions - Over the Chair

There are several positions I use to punish D. when he has earned a spanking. The most common position is OTK, but other positions may work even better for you. Don't be afraid to experiment with different positions. You might stumble on one that really enhances the effectiveness of the spanking.

Chair spanking positions are perfect for administering serious discipline such as paddling. I use this position when D. has been extremely disrespectful. The position leaves his bottom exposed and vulnerable, and allows for the best swing [of the paddle]. I instruct him to put his hands flat on the seat, bent over the back of the chair OR I turn the chair around and tell him to bend over. His bottom is positioned well and I kep good sight of the target area.

Thursday, February 23, 2006

Aftercare - Open Communication

By far, one of the most cherished benefits of a firm spanking is the open and vulnerable communication D. and I share. If he has experienced an emotional release, I give him a few minutes to absorb the experience and return to reality before swooping in to comfort him. When I feel that he is calm enough, I pull him close and whisper in his ear.

D. expresses his gratitude for my efforts at correcting his behavior. He lets me know that he understands the need for punishment. The emotional connection and intimacy you experience here can lead to sexual intercourse, if both of you are in agreement. The two of you should be sensitive to each other's needs at this important moment.

Take this time to reconnect after the emotional experience of the spanking. Some "experts" recommend not spending too much time talking about the spanking immediately after, but you gotta do whatever is necessary to keep the communication going. This is a fantastic opportunity to enhance the emotional bond.

Tuesday, February 21, 2006

Aftercare - Cuddling

It's a good idea to spend a long while cuddling and nurturing each other after a spanking. After his punishment, D. needs encouragement as he emerges from the vulnerable space of the spanking back into everyday reality. If he has experienced an intense emotional release, I am there to provide assurances of love and trust.

Thursday, February 16, 2006

Administering the Spanking

Once his clothes are out of the way, you can utter the next set of instructions - "All right, bend over!" It is time for the actual spanking to begin. This is where you pull your naughty boy close and give him the spanking that he deserves. You might want to say something like "I want to be sure you remember this lesson!" to signal the beginning of the spanking.
  • The first 20+ smacks are hand warm-ups. Make sure you have his full attention. If he moves around too much, you may need to remind him to keep still. He may squirm around a little as you spank him. If D. is not squirming, I am not spanking hard enough.
  • After the warm-ups, you should start spanking him in earnest. Alternate your smacks evenly between the two cheeks. Every now and then you can place 2-4 smacks in rapid succession on the same cheek. Concentrate on the lower half of his bottom and down the tops of both thighs.
  • Continue to scold him while you spank him. As we discussed in an earlier section, it is important that you scold your naughty boy while you spank him. Remind him about the reason for his punishment.
  • Switch implements when necessary. Don't be afraid to take a brief break from smacking his bare bottom to change positions or switch to another implement.
  • Follow through with your spanking plan. I always make sure I spank D. until I get the desired response. It may be difficult to spank him, but it is important to be sure the lesson has gotten through. You must demonstrate that you can follow through.
How many swats do you give? This is not a question that has a universal answer. Generally, you should continue to spank until YOU are satisfied beyond any doubt that your naughty boy is truly repentant, and that the misbehavior that necessitated the spanking has been corrected.

Thursday, February 09, 2006

Baring His Bottom

Before I begin the actual spanking, I require D. to bare his bottom. I am more of a hands-on disciplinarian, so I often pull his pants and underwear off myself. If you do want him to do the work, you'll need to give him clear instructions. Say something like "I want you to pull your pants down and bend over the bed!" Don't forget to use your Command Tone as you give him clear instructions.

If your man does not move fast enough, you might want to increase the severity of the spanking or possibly add an implement. If he is being a real BOY about his discipline, remind him that you love him (and that you must spank him for his behavior), but you will not tolerate stall tactics.

Tuesday, February 07, 2006

Deciding on a Position

The choice of a position has a profound impact on the tone of the spanking. When I decide on a position for D., I consider which implements I will be using. A belt or a strap requires a large swing area, so I typically have him bend over a bed for these implements.

Since a spanking usually begins with hand warm-ups, I begin with the over the knee position, then change to another position when it's time to change implements. An over the knee spanking is more intimate because both partners are physically connected during the spanking. For this reason, OTK is one of our most popular positions.

I also like requiring D. to lie on his stomach on a bed or a sturdy table for a spanking. Adding a few pillows under his hips may make this position more comfortable, and will definitely provide a better target for my belt or strap.

A more challenging position is bent over some piece of furniture (such as a bed or a couch). Bent over positions can be more intense because the gluteus muscles are stretched. There will be times when I plan on milking D. before the spanking, and I'll start him in the bent over position for these sessions.

Friday, February 03, 2006

Determining the Severity of the Spanking

This particular task requires some advance planning. I use the list of rules in conjunction with the Disciplinary Log to determine the severity of D.'s punishment. The more deliberate the violation, the more severe I make the spanking. If he is repeating the same offense over and over (as with his sarcasm), I increase the severity to make the spanking more effective.

Use the Disciplinary Log to help determine the required intensity. I like to hear D. squeal. I like to watch him squirm. I like to make the spanking a memorable event - so that he remembers it for quite a long time. This is another reason I've required him to describe his punishments in the Disciplined One weblog. If I must administer a Repentance spanking, I build the severity until D. is exhibiting the necessary tears of repentance.